When a relationship of four years unraveled, I fell apart. I ended up moving cities, quitting my job, and traveling to Mexico. I had fun and wonderful times in Mexico, met many people, and enjoyed myself. Yet behind my smile there, I pretended I wasn’t hurting. I pretended my heart wasn’t breaking.
When I returned, I didn’t have a job or friends to turn to. I had after all changed cities and moved back in with my parents where I had no social circle or knew anyone. All I had was me.
During this time, I threw myself into getting to know myself, even though I was desperately confused and still held onto the hope that I would reconcile with him.
When I was in the relationship, I had forgotten about myself. What I liked to do and what made me happy. I did everything I liked to do and tried to heal my pain and wounds. I immersed myself in my stillness and developed a meditation practice, cooked, went to coffee shops to read romance books like I did as a teenager, and strengthened my relationship with my intuition and inner guidance.
It took around two years to let go of this relationship with a commitment phobic man. Besides this relationship, I let go of people, events, and things in my life that no longer served me. Some of this was by choice. Other times, it wasn’t. When I didn’t want to let go, the Universe created the circumstances for this to occur.
I started to work again and resume my life again. I was now ready for love. I was ready to meet the right partner and build a life with him.
This led me to a journey to learn more about love and all its forms. How do you manifest love into your life? How do you have a happy, fulfilled relationship with your partner? How do you meet your Beloved?
All these questions tugged at my heart. The most transformative realization I received was: it all starts deep within us. I wanted to be in a relationship with a man who was fully committed and devoted to me and our partnership. I wanted our relationship to be real and vulnerable. I wanted us to show up and serve each other in an honest way with our hearts wide open and to expand together.
Here are the six steps I took to manifest my perfect partner into my life:
- Work on your yourself, (emotional, health, body, etc.) as an act of self-love.
In the two years, I spent letting of this relationship and other changes in my life like moving from our family home of years, changing jobs, I didn’t focus on my health. I didn’t feel well, so I didn’t feel motivated to work on my body and health.
A pain sprung up in my right feet and I ignored it until I couldn’t wear heels or specific shoes. Now that I am ready to manifest love into my life, I am going to the gym, eat healthy, and eating my vitamins.
I also worked with a coach on my emotional health and peeled away layer after layer to reveal my true feminine essence and sexuality. My intention to do these things was so I can show up more fully when love is in my life. I also did them to show love to myself.
Taking care of your body and emotional health is a tremendous act of self-love and gets you in alignment with your desire.
- Write letters to your Beloved/Twin Soul daily.
A beautiful practice I’ve adopted is writing letters to my Beloved daily. How does this work? It’s literally as easy it sounds! I’ve always been big into journaling and writing and I took it a step further when my coach suggested I tried this. I didn’t heed her suggestion for a good year until when I felt the deep desire to share my life with someone.
I went and bought a pretty fancy journal. You can buy any kind of journal, however I decided to get a blue, elegant journal that makes it feel special when I write letters to him.
I created time every evening to write to him as if he was right in front of me right now. I tell him how my day is going. If I went to the movies, museum, or party, I pretended he was there, too and wrote about what I did with him. The key is to write this in present tense as if he is in your life currently.
The purpose is to connect with him on an energetic and nurturing this relationship, so when he arises in your life, you’ll recognize him immediately.
- Clear your blocks and fears.
This is such an important step! Often, we go take all the right steps and go to the right places to find love. We go to the speed dating event and set our dating profile on online websites. Yet, there are deeply ingrained fears and blocks that aren’t allowing the love you deeply desire to come to you.
How do you clear all these blocks to create that clear channel for your partner to flow to you with ease? It is about simple and difficult. I wrote letters to the men who were part of my past. I mentioned the good times and the pain I felt and especially the lessons I learned.
I created a ritual out of it and burned the letter. I went through each and every person and experience that impacted my life and told them I forgave them and asked them to forgive me. This created space deep within me and I had released these relationships and more importantly, released the fears and blocks.
- Fill your life with richness and joy.
You don’t need to follow these steps in a specific order or wait to feel joy in your life. Surround yourself with people you enjoy. Do the things that uplift you and make you feel happy. Even if you’re not where you are in your life, find ways to bring more richness and enjoy your life. Simple things like taking a dance class or visiting a museum or cooking a meal will do wonders.
I’ve started doing the things that I truly love and make me feel happy in my life and in the process of manifesting my Beloved into my life, I also have put myself out there more. I go to festivals and places that I enjoy where can meet my Beloved. This is a way to let the Universe know: Yes, I am ready!
- Act as if you have received your partner.
Writing daily letters to your Beloved is an effective and beautiful way to act as if he or she is in your life already. I momentarily do forget and feel he is in my life. That is the whole purpose!
Take this on to an even larger level. Do things that will show the Universe you are ready and committed to drawing love into your life. You can book two tickets to a concert or list a guest for a wedding you are attending months later. This sends a powerful message to your own self as well and you start to get into the mode of taking action towards this desire.
- Surrender and receive your partner.
Lastly and most importantly, when your Beloved does arrive in the physical sense and realm and you recognize the energy, surrender immediately. Stay in the present moment and allow it to move on its own flow. Receive him or she with deep gratitude, love, and lots of magic! Enjoy the journey and your relationship!
Image source: BERTA