In Enchanted Silence, Shivani is in a relationship with her investment banker fiancé Shaan.  I don’t want to give away the details, her relationship unravels with him when he cheats on her and afterwards, she is faced with the task of processing her pain and moving forward. 

There are many reasons for why a relationship unravels and when it does, it is a clear sign to let go of the relationship and start life fresh again.  To move forward.

As I’ve mentioned several times, Enchanted Silence is very, very inspired from my own life.  I identify with the main character and there are strong elements of my personality I infused in Shivani.  In my own life, I had to let go of a significant relationship.  It took me time, around two years, to move forward.

I can tell you healing takes time and requires deep reflection and inner work.  It requires major shifts from the inside in order for these changes to be truly life-changing and transformative in your external world.  

It means forgiving yourself big time for what you did do or didn’t do or said or didn’t say.  I remember repeating certain events and things I said over and over in my head about my past relationship.

For my healing process to truly occur, I had to dig deep within and ask myself: What fears are triggered from my letting go of this relationship?  What beliefs did I carry from this relationship?  What stories do I keep telling myself about men and romantic relationships?

The answers to these questions astounded me.  After some deep digging internally, I came up with:

I felt I wouldn’t be able to let go of my relationship or that I shouldn’t because it meant I wasn’t successful at relationships or am a good person.  I also believed that having been with this person for four years, it had to stand for something.  That if I worked harder, then this relationship would work.  I deserved this…to be with a man who couldn’t love me the way I deeply desired to be loved or be committed to.

The story I kept telling myself was that I wouldn’t be able to move forward and start life fresh again.  That I wouldn’t be able to find someone again.  That I couldn’t have a healthy relationship filled with emotional and sexual intimacy and richness. 

Just by writing all this, I can feel my heart and my body respond.  These beliefs have clearly been embedded emotionally and energetically in my body and playing out in my life.

Now try this:  What new story do I desire to tell myself about men and romantic relationships?  What does this new story say about my worth?  What needs to be accepted, loved, and integrated into my full self?  What is an action step(s) I can take to make this story real?

The new story I’d like to tell myself: I absolutely deserve and am worthy of such a magnificent, wonderful, support man in my life.  That I have sacred union with him and have a beautiful, healthy relationship that is filled with beauty, grace, forgiveness, trust, and lots and lots of sexiness.  I am worthy of this and welcoming tremendous amounts of love and abundance into my life and our relationship is  a reflection of this deep richness.  And I too, am a sexy, beautiful, marvelous woman.

I must accept that I’m not perfect always.  That I can be stubborn at times.  That I’ve made mistakes and have not loved myself completely which reflected in my relationship with myself and romance.  I forgive myself for all this and starting this very moment, I love myself wholly and even love myself during all the moments I didn’t feel entirely beautiful and whole.  I am enough for who I am.

The action step I can take to make this story real is to put myself in the dating scene again and meet men and as I move through this process, I feel genuinely whole and enough as I am right now.  And that I can pursue my passions and have fun and feel deep joy in my own life by going for massages, festivals, meeting friends, and doing everything I love to do that makes me me.

As you can see here, I took it upon to change the story to a new story with new beliefs that serve me and support me as I move forward in starting life fresh again.  As I wrote this, I literally felt my body and energy changing to the words.  It was transformative!  And of course, this was simply a glimpse into the process.  There is more deep inner work to do.

There are some beautiful sensual and intuitive practices to combine with this that will support you to facilitate your transformation process faster.

Sensual Practices:  Create a sacred self-pleasure ritual where you connect to your soul through your sexuality and allow more pleasure into your life.  This practice is customized to whatever you’d like it to be.  The whole point is to have an intention and do this daily as a way to deeply love yourself and become more acquainted to your womanhood.  You can go for massages and dress up in ways that make you feel feminine, soft, and sexy in your day-to-day life, not just parties or special events.  Again, do what makes you feel like a sexy, beautiful woman.

Intuitive Practices:  Process all your feelings and fears and even excitement that arises about starting life fresh again.  Write daily in your journal.  Keep it handy when you go to work or by your bed.  Allow yourself to cry and laugh freely and when and as you wish.  Become crystal clear how you’d like to feel in your new life and whether that includes moving forward with a new relationship or you wish to simply spend time with yourself.

Are you in a similar situation?  Are you looking to move forward again?  Would you like to heal your wounds and become a brand new transformed woman?

If this post resonated with you and you’d like to move forward and start life fresh again from a relationship’s unraveling, please get in touch with me and schedule time with me to become more Wildly intimate with your desires and goals.  I’d love to hold space for your own deep transformation, dear Wildly Intimate Woman.

 

 

Image source: pearlz-n-lace.tumblr.com