• Home
  • About Priyanka
  • Work With Me
    • Books
  • Gifts For You
  • Articles
  • Connect

Priyanka Yadvendu

Answers to Joy, Intimacy, Security, Family & Romantic Relationships for 20-Something Women

  • Home
  • About Priyanka
  • Work With Me
    • Books
  • Gifts For You
  • Articles
  • Connect

I Still Cry A Lot and Am Proud of My Commitment to My Sexuality and Emotional Health

August 20, 2018 by Priyanka Leave a Comment

Dear Reader,

Earlier this year, I was really scared that I was going to getting more and more depressed.  It was a difficult time in my life.  I’d go to work pretending everything was perfect and just go about doing my job.  I carried much repressed emotion in my body.  Emotion stored in my body from the last couple years.  Until I broke down on the phone with my boss.  I didn’t intend to, it just happened.  I remember emotion choking my throat and I could barely speak.

Being Committed to My Sexuality and Emotional Health

Being Committed to My Sexuality and Emotional Health

I felt embarrassed and deeply shamed.  But there was another emotion behind the embarrassment and shame.  I felt free.  I felt liberated.  Freedom pulsed in my body.  My mask had been taken off.  I was hurting inside deeply.  When I look back, I want to hold that child woman tightly and tell her she is a beautiful person inside and outside.  And brave for how much she revealed the true state of herself with her boss.  And brave for requesting leave from her boss even though she felt like she was letting him and the team down.

I remember those weeks clearly.  My boss supported me greatly and told me he didn’t care what anyone thought if I took leave and it was something very touching and meaningful.  I later thought sleeping in the night how much I wanted this quality in my man.  Someone who wouldn’t give a damn about what anyone else thought, only my well-being and happiness.

Through encouragement from my boss and my own resilience and strength, I started to attend some church meetings online and listen to sermons.  I’m not a Christian, however the messages resonated deeply with me and I felt peace in my heart.  I was looking for peace and found some through the sermons.

I had so much anxiety at that time that I’d shake in my home.  It was scary.  I cried all day every day.  I remember lying in bed praying to God and asking Him to make me better.  I had to also stop working with my Sex Coach for a month because it was too much to handle.  I also got a cold that was almost close to being bronchitis.

In about two weeks and my boss constantly checking up on me and sending me Bible verses, I had gotten better.  This may sound like an exaggeration, though it truly felt like a miracle.  I was about to take leave for a month or two from work and suddenly I’ve started to feel happier and lighter.  I continued my therapy and speaking with her my heart out.

I continued to work on my sexuality.  Even now, I have to stop and breathe when I’m working on assignments my Sex Coach gave me or when I’m watching videos on the online digital course Erotic BluePrints by Jaiya.  I cry in the middle of this sexual work so deeply that it scares me.  Things come up from my past.  Other times, I feel I’m not beautiful enough or worry I won’t be a good enough woman for who becomes my partner/Beloved.  Other times, my pleasure feels so erotic and beautiful and joyful.  I just let everything arise and feel it.

I feel that I’ve felt the range of emotions.  I feel like truly a woman in every sense of the world now.  I feel more vulnerable and stronger at the same time.  I’m continuing to work on my sexuality and I’m moving slowly and trusting myself and exploring my edges slowly.  I never realized how much hard work it is to spend time on healing and nourishing yourself emotionally, mentally, and sexually.  And for this, I feel really proud of myself.

Lots of Love,

Priyanka Yadvendu

 

Image source:  cushysundays

Share This Post

Filed Under: Ramblings, Self-Esteem, Transformation

Wildly Intimate Woman Experiment – 10 Week Deep Inquiry and Exploration on Connecting to My Wildly Intimate Woman

October 31, 2016 by Priyanka 1 Comment

Hello Sunshine!

I’ve decided to do an experiment.  An experiment and deep inquiry and exploration on connecting to my Wildly Intimate Woman.  What would happen if I became more wildly intimate with myself on every level – mind, body, heart, soul?  What would be the outcomes and results?  How would I feel?  How would I change and transform my life?

Anna Andres: Wildly Intimate Woman

Anna Andres: Wildly Intimate Woman

I want this process to be very internal focused because as you focus more on your inner world and what qualities you want to embody more of in your life, your outer world significantly shifts.  That’s when you have breakthroughs.  I thought this would be the perfect way to complete 2016.

I’ll be incorporating practices, body work, and deep reflection and inquiries every week for ten weeks focusing on a specific pillar.  This will guide me to become more deeply acquainted with my Wildly Intimate Woman and integrate mental intelligence (The Mind), instinctual intelligence/body wisdom (The Body), emotional intelligence (The Heart), and higher self/spirit (The Soul) in this journey.  Every Sunday, I’ll sit down and write a post on my experience and how I’m progressing and transforming.

Here are the ten Pillars I’ll be focusing on:

PILLAR 1: Focus of Attention

PILLAR 2: Vulnerability

PILLAR 3: Connection

PILLAR 4: Communication

PILLAR 5: Receive

PILLAR 6: Transmit

PILLAR 7: Romance

PILLAR 8: Intuition

PILLAR 9: Erotic Woman

PILLAR 10: Sacred Union

Hope you enjoy this journey along with me!

 

Image source: ANNE OF CARVERSVILLE

Share This Post

Filed Under: Ramblings, Self-Esteem, Transformation

Accept Your Mistakes Lovingly Instead of Feeling Ashamed

April 12, 2015 by Priyanka Leave a Comment

I couldn’t help, but reflect over certain decisions I made recently. I couldn’t decide how I felt. Should I feel happy? Or should I feel sad? Or upset? Thrilled? In all likelihood, it was a mixture of all these emotions.

Accept Your Mistakes Lovingly

Accept Your Mistakes Lovingly

I also wasn’t sure if I had made the right decision or not. Maybe I had reacted too fast. Maybe I should have been more patient. Was it a mistake? But it was already made…

Accept Your Mistakes Lovingly

Changing your perspective on your mistakes can change everything. Suddenly, it’ll be an enriching and positive experience.

Instead of looking at them as crutches, you can love your mistakes. Because there was a purpose behind you making them. They teach you a lot about yourself.

At the time, it may not feel that way, but when you accept your mistakes lovingly, you can impart the beautiful lesson hidden in them.

Don’t Rehash the Same Story

Most people will repeat the same story to themselves over and over. They’ll beat themselves up over the mistake.

The mistake already happened. The experience has been completed. You can stop being hard on yourself. When you stop rehashing the story, you can find bliss in the present moment.

You can focus on creating beautiful new experiences and moving forward step by step.

Love Yourself Wholeheartedly, Even Your Flaws

When you have gone through an experience you’re not sure about, instead of being hard on yourself, you should love yourself.

If a friend or stranger had gone through such an experience, what would you tell them? You would probably be kind and gentle to them. You must do the same towards yourself!

Your Mistakes Are Great Learning Experiences

Most of all, your mistakes are great learning experiences. They are a part of who you are and become.

What are your thoughts on this post? Please share with me in the comments.

Share This Post

Filed Under: Self-Esteem, Transformation

Embrace Your Discomfort and Desire to Cry

March 6, 2015 by Priyanka Leave a Comment

Do you feel like to cry sometimes? Do you let the tears fall? Or do you suppress your desire to cry? I used to be the one who ignored my impulse to cry and carried on with the day.

Honor Your Desires, Even to Cry

Honor Your Desires, Even to Cry

This Week, I Wanted to Cry…

To be honest, I had some confronting realizations about myself just the other day. I was at work and suddenly I developed this urge to cry. But I was at work. I wanted to honor myself and my desire.

Related: Making Space for Miracles to Happen

So I Headed to the Restroom and Cried

I let the tears fall. I didn’t even wipe them. It was not a loud crying, but a very gentle, soft crying. It was coming straight from the heart.

I knew why I was crying. Part of the reason. But there were other reasons that my mind couldn’t understand. But my heart already knew.

Peel Off a Layer of Darkness and Allow the Light to Shine Through

My heart knew something I didn’t entirely. It needed to clear some blocks and whatever I was feeling. Crying made me feel lighter. The old me would have let my mind and ego take over. How dare I cry? That means I’m not a strong woman!

I peeled off a layer of darkness and my ego to let my inner light shine. And I will share in another post, but I met up with a close girlfriend and had a beautiful, life-changing conversation. Now I know why I wanted to cry that day. I had to clear that block and process something else that this conversation with my friend revealed.

I will share in another post 🙂

What is your biggest takeaway from this post? Please share with me in the comments.

Share This Post

Filed Under: Self-Esteem

6 Easy Tips On How the 20-Something Can Keep Their Sanity In the Dating Process

February 23, 2015 by Priyanka Leave a Comment

Have you just jumped onto the dating bandwagon? Finding it challenging?  Getting frustrated? The dating jungle can be fun and exciting, but also nerve wracking. I want to share six easy tips on how you can keep your sanity in the dating process.

Keeping Your Sanity during the Dating Process

Keeping Your Sanity during the Dating Process

Here they are!

Let Him Chase You

When you’re talking to a guy, let him chase you and take most of the initiative. He should be the one asking you out for coffee or dinner. You are the prize, so he better be on top of his game.

Don’t Be Scared to Initiate Contact Sometimes

Having reinforced my previous point, I also believe sometimes you can also take the initiative. I believe that the first date must be initiated by the man. However, a man will love it if you also ask him out on subsequent dates.

Date More Than One Man

To keep your sanity and not put all your focus on one man until exclusivity hasn’t been discussed, see more than one man. Weigh your options until that loving, worthy man doesn’t lock you down and want to have an exclusive relationship with you.

Continue Having Your Normal Life

Remember to keep doing the things you were doing before you started dating. Taking a salsa class? Going to Meet Up groups? Well, keep doing that! Your life doesn’t change just because you started dating him. It will cause you to be upbeat and confident and not put everything on one man.

There Are Great, Quality Men Everywhere

If a guy doesn’t show much excitement anymore and the chemistry is fading, then move on. There are wonderful, quality men everywhere. You can get to know one of them…

Trust Your Gut Feeling

No matter what I say and all the dating advice you find in books and online, nothing will compensate for your intuition. Do what you feel is best and trust your gut feeling.

Related: Relationships Are Powerful Teachers – 6 Key Lessons They Teach You

What are your thoughts on this post? Please share with me in the comments.

Share This Post

Filed Under: Ramblings, Romantic Advice, Self-Esteem

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • …
  • 13
  • Next Page »
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • RSS
  • Twitter

Want to Connect to Your Wildly Intimate Woman?

Join The Community and Receive My Intimate Emails

Meet Priyanka

Priyanka Yadvendu makes her home in the San Francisco Bay Area and enjoys running, volunteering, and drinking chocolate martinis. Read More…

Read Articles On:

Search this Site:

Latest from the Blog:

  • Enchanted Silence: Connect with Your Erotic, Sensual Woman and Become in Touch with Your Wildly Deep Feminine Sexuality and Softness
  • Enchanted Silence: Feel Deep Love and Intrigue for Your Own Life and Manifest Romantic Love and Your Beloved into Your Life
  • Enchanted Silence: Become More Comfortable with the Uncomfortable and Take Chances Again
  • Reflections from 2018: A Slow, Intense Transformative Year
  • I Am Finding My Beauty and Sensuality Through the Art of Dancing

Recent Comments:

  • Why You Should Be Connected to Your Work? - Wildly Intimate on Write Down Ideas that Come to You in Moments of Inspiration
  • Ladies, Never Apologize for Your Success - Wildly Intimate on Receive Gifts and Love Graciously With An Open Heart
  • Dropping into Your Heart and Owning Your Desires - Wildly Intimate on 4 Lessons I Learned from The Daring Moment that Forever Changed My Twenties
  • 4 Easy Ways to be Comfortable With Your Sexuality - Wildly Intimate on 6 Ways Guys Play Games in Dating and Relationships
  • The Moment You're Ready to Quit...Miracles Happen - Wildly Intimate on Receive Gifts and Love Graciously With An Open Heart

Want to Connect to Your Wildly Intimate Woman?

Join The Community and Receive My Intimate Emails

Copyright ©2014 Priyanka Yadvendu · All Rights Reserved · Site Design by The CreativeB · Login